the cashier gave me the most condescending look when I took this
My Mom just accidentally prematurely sent an email to an accounting firm… It was supposed to say ‘I am afraid that we will have to postpone our meeting”
but she hit send when all it said was
I am afraid
THIS POS T GETS ME EVEYRTIME
I FOUND IT
NO ONE BELIEVED ME WHEN I SAID I HEARD AN ICE CREAM TRUCK DROPIN BEATS DOWN THE STREET
NOW I HAVE A VID TO PROVE IT OMG I’M SO HAPPY I DIDN’T IMAGINE IT YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA HOW HAPPY THIS MAKES ME
msg me if u want hints
when your favorite band has shitty merch
Ashton can do so many things.
Need a guitarist? Ashton
Need a bassist? Ashton
Need a lead singer? Ashton
Need someone to make you smile? Ashton
Need someone to ruin your life forever? Ashton
truest shit ive ever read
bullshit. cheaters don’t strive for A’s. they strive for C’s. getting A’s make shit look to obvious especially when you ain’t doing the bare minimum in class
I went for A’s when I cheated.
who wants to cheat for a c? if you gon cheat, cheat big
"lemme rob this bank for 3 grand…. dont wanna make it….obvious"
sorry son, it’s not MY fault you were born on opposite day.. now where are my presents
mother: is it a boy or a girl?
doctor: *puts baby between teeth* it’s a metaphor
what do you call a message sent by a girl?
i got 7 messages saying this joke is offensive & that i’m the reason feminism exists